Two days ago i was supposed to blog about learning the word SURRENDER and learning what it means to have faith.
Blup.
ahh, surrender.
That word, how do I comprehend the meaning of it?
One word that describes to give up, to give in, to admit defeat, to submit.
What caught my attention and interest was the definition with a phrase, to lay down your arms.
to lay down your arms.
White flag raised.
When you just have no other way but in total desperation, to just drop down on your knees and say, “ Lord, I have nothing. And I can’t hold on to my own strength. No, I can’t win this. I can’t do this.”
Surrender.
Learning ain’t easy. but just letting go everything and not caring anymore is.
Tempting,ain’t it? To forget it all.
Taking that step and yes, giving up but when you give up to the Lord.
Wholly surrendering into the arms of the Lord.
Still sitting.
Sitting still.
but knowing He holds me and everything works together for good for those who love the Lord.
Not about the miracles and wonders He does. OH, He does remarkable mind blowing things but I learnt an additional lesson here.
Faith. Surrender.
Now, the truth is that I doubted that faith as small as the mustard seed can move mountains. Oh come on now. Are you kidding me? How could such thing even happen.
Demonstrated and proven wrong right down.
I had to have faith in this situation. I had to. Had no choice but to lay my hands down and let go.
Understanding it.
Going through it.
Filling up forms, in faith.
Fast forward,2 days later.
How and why?
I told the Lord that I don’t know where to go.
Myanmar, Laos or Cambodia?
Till. I laid my head down.
Asked. Not expecting an answer.
The thought, ”oh,well,I have to decide on my own and I suppose I shall choose Laos.”
Prayer interrupted.
Recalling that short prayer note I wrote to Cambodia on that last day of APYAC, year 2009.
“God,Cambodia?”.
Astonished. Awestruck. Dumbfounded. Overwhelmed. What more adjectives shall I use?
He revealed.
Heard my parents’ room door open, slightly. 3:ooam.
I jumped out of my seat.
“MUMMY!! I think God wants me to go to Cambodia.”
Told her everything.
“Since the Lord revealed, now, mummy, don’t worry, the money will come.”
The excitement. The thrill. The delight. The joy. My Lord.
Humorous God.
5:30 am that same day, (8th of May 2012).
They are up early. Dad’s eating his two half boiled eggs. New maker. Mum and her coffee with bread (I just realized, I am very much like her when it comes to that,haha).
Told dad what happened. I saw him smiling. That made my heart jump.
And there I go in excitement posting a screenshot of what happens in Cambodia.
*oh,grins*.
And the day went on as usual. Yes, I was too excited to sleep the whole night, so, I went to bed at 9:30am.
Sleeps sleeps sleeps.
Evening came and a friend of ours, dear Aunty Melody pops out on that picture commenting and she asks how can she help in this?
I told her that a prayer would be great. I mean, when you have people praying for you, I personally gain joy. Seriously. Prayer brings joy.
And that moment, I stood up. As my eyes read, I was in utter incredulity.
She offered. To fund me.
Lord, are you kidding me?
In disbelief I called Edd to tell him what happened, I ran down to mum. Mumbled a bit, and the phone goes to mum,I told her to speak to edd.
And she has a lovely conversation with him. She walks around the marble table, touches the laundry basket, oh, and she stands again, and they talk and converse. Yeah. Mum.
My mind was overflowing with emotions I have no idea how to put across.
Like seriously, God? Are you kidding?!!
“Mummmmy….. aunty melody offered!”
She smiled. Yes,a wide one.
“see, God’s seeing you through”.
I wanted her to see it so badly, I ran up, brought my red lappie and read her everything what aunty melody said.
I facebook inboxed her. And she replied with asking me if there’s any banks around that offer Western Union or international bank transfers.
She is now,in States.
I didn’t know what to reply. The next thing I see in my inbox before even replying. She herself found an address!
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
I got her on skype and we spoke. Pretty much those who were in the Maathai residence did.
And she told dad that she would like to offer to pay for everything.
They talked. She looked lovely. Beautiful, I tell you.
When they said their goodbyes after speaking. Now, we thank You Lord for technology.
I told her to give me a sec. Took my lappie back up the room.
Rannnnnn…
Got the lights on. Locks room door.
Personal talk with her now.
Why ??? Why do this?
Her words:
When you can’t go, you can send those who can!
She wants to serve the Lord in this way. And her heart is willing.
Aunty Melody and her family was a missionary to Malaysia, Indonesia and many other countries.
She used to live in our own home in Kluang, not this current house, well, the house that we rent out. They helped out in church for a while and in November, around 4 years ago, she had to leave Malaysia back to the States when her second son past away.
We’ve not spoken for a while now, well, till yesterday.
Okay,back.
I received another inbox message from her a while after talking to her and she told me that after posting about me wanting to go to Cambodia, she received cheques/checks from Tennessee, North Carolina, and a one church congregation. Even Vicki Yohe(a gospel singer) and her husband.
What can I say Lord?
Nothing but thank you.
flabbergasted again. Wordless.
The joy ,the exhilaration.
Okay, I was like, “God, You’re actually real. So real.”
Have you ever experienced that?
Faith stretched. And the Lord provides.
He is Jehovah Jireh, my provider.
#grateful
I have yet to meet the team, in a month’s time. Testimony timeee then!
His name be lifted! GLORIFIED, I tell ya.
My heart Explodes.
I reach up, You reach down here to me.
And when you say yes to Him in the area of missions:
You see the whole lot happen and it will take place right in front of your eyes.
He uses willing hearts. And if He calls, answer!
“Send me and I will go”.
Right now: Cambodia.
I understand now.
Compositions of One Heart's Language 